The song by England Dan and John Ford Coley is running through my mind. The one entitled, I’d Really Love to See You Tonight. You know, it starts out…
“Hello, yeah, it’s been a while.
Not much, how ‘bout you?
I’m not sure why I called.
I guess, I really just wanted to talk to you”
I do realize it’s a song about old lovers and one of them is wanting to reconnect. It’s been over three years since I wrote my last blog post, and I thought wow, it has been a while. And I must admit, writing a blog post often feels like reaching out to have a little chat. Yes, I realize it’s a one-sided conversation, but I love your comments, so as I get blogging again, give me a shout out and share your thoughts.
My last post was in September of 2020, and the title proclaimed, “It’s About to Get Real” And life did indeed bring us some bona fide experiences these last three years. It has been very “real”. And I have felt torn. Do I share that while beauty and joy abound, it’s been hard.
Do I share that some days, after there are no more tears to cry until I rehydrate myself- I take a brisk long walk, or tackle a pile of dishes, or mop the floor, love on the people in front of me, work on a piece of art, half-heartedly start a new project, or do a random act of kindness?
I spend hours in a day when you add up all the minutes, writing in my mind. When the baby of the family was younger, she use to say to me, “Earth to Momma Jamie,” because sometimes I was doing my daydream writing in my mind. Stand-up comedy routines (that’s right I am working on my tight 10 for an amateur night this spring at a local comedy club), scenes within my novel, blog posts, movie ideas, children’s book ideas, and the list goes on and on. But when it comes time to sit down and actually write- I have not.
Paralyzed to put pen to paper or fingers to keys. Family health crises, weight gain, amazing travels, depression, the gift of a beautiful marriage, grieving deep losses, sweet-sustaining friendships, standing on the edge of happy news as an outsider not able to look in, funny anecdotes, lessons learned, life observed, are all things I want to share, but I haven’t. Writers often expound on what they know. We often write from the viewpoint or origin of our hearts and my heart has been a jumbled mess full of love and sorrow.
And so, I have missed you all, and since I believe, without a doubt,” it takes a village”, I want my writing to be an encouragement. I want it to be real and honest, and FUNNY when appropriate, and share growth. It’s a big world out there and sometimes it is easy to feel small and insignificant. And I know when we turn towards one another, and we are open, life doesn’t seem so hard, and the earth shrinks a little. We read tales that make us realize- we all struggle, we all hurt. We understand our suffering is not quite as unique as we think. We are not alone. We are not invisible. We are worthy of love and connection. We matter and have to stop believing we don’t.
As I step out of my shell to write again, I am reminding myself of the saying “those that mind don’t matter, and those that matter don’t mind.” I hope I am always a voice to remind you dear reader no matter what life throws your way…
You Matter,
Jamie
